Things I Will Never Say
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Anxiety at It's worse

6/18/2019

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​I think the conversation around mental health is something that is in the front of everyone’s mind in today’s society. Surprising statistics show that so many people are silent sufferers. We know at least one person within our life struggling to keep everything under control.
 
Unfortunately I am a sufferer too and my enemy is my anxiety. Anxiety seems to be something that many people have heard of but not many understand. I have had my own family admit they can’t relate to what I am feeling.
 
For a long time I thought I was getting better thought I had it all under control but recently I have realised that this is far from the case. I had somehow managed to kid myself that I was finally rid of this dark shadow that seemed to loom over my shoulder constantly. Instead I realised I have just been hiding behind a smoke screen instead and I was close to breaking point.
 
It all came to light after a stressful few weeks at work followed by the demand of family and responsibilities and a few arguments thrown in there as well. It had to be one of the scariest points of my anxiety so far waking up unable to breath and having to ring 999 to get help.
 
I have been on medication for my anxiety for a while and had managed to reduce my dosages to s when I needed them so for all that to change and rely on them daily seemed to me such a set back.
 
The thing is it wasn’t a set back it was my body’s way of telling me when enough is enough. I had split myself in so many directions to keep everyone happy I was neglecting myself in the long run. So I have taken steps to help me get my anxiety under control.
 
I think the first accomplishment was admitting to people around me. I had been struggling at work for such a long time letting them know what I was suffering was a big step but one I wish I had taken earlier. They instantly wanted to help and have pushed me to seek help through many different organisations. I feel as though They will support me in all decisions that I make as well as keep my wellbeing in mind.
 
Another step was identifying my triggers and micro managing them. Taking that step back is just what I needed knowing when to push myself and when not to and being proud of the small victories I achieve.
 
My life so far has included a lot of change it seems never to stay still for too long but making the effort to stop and take time not only for my self but making sure my life is a constant has helped more than you would think. I t has helped me in dealing with the changes that have to happen and has made me slow down and appreciate the life I have made for myself before it all changes again. I have started to set small goals to work towards whether that is a holiday or a shopping trip or a weekend away it all helps me focus on the positives in my life at the moment.
 
The biggest thing I have come to realise is that talking about mental health is not the end of the world. So many people can relate to what I am going through and together we can help each other with tips and advice along the way. This journey is by far from over for me but it feels a lot more manageable now I know I am not on my own and no matter what someone has my back.
 
S
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    Hi All, Hope you enjoy reading all about what I get up in all aspects of my life. I would love to hear all your opinions so get in touch!!

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